Don't quote me on this

A few quotable moments from my loquacious friends, Paraguayan and North American. Some quotes have been translated, from Guarani and/or Spanish, to the best of my ability. And, if you see yourself quoted here and I never asked for your permission, please don't call your lawyer because I'm positive I didn't actually ask or warn any of you. So thank you for your anonymous participation.


"That guy would be really hot if he had teeth."

"May I hold the baby?"
-"Oh... but he's not wearing socks."

"Mmm, it smells like Paraguay. Like sweaty fruit or fruity sweat; I'm not sure which one."

"Despite 10 weeks of technical training, the most important thing I have received to received is a cell phone with solitaire."

"Porque?"
-Porcause, I want to.

"I love my material things!"

-"Yeah, you love them now because you're still in American mode. It will probably take several months for you to be completely converted to the third world lifestyle. By the time you get back here you'll be whistling  a different tune. Then I will buy you a pair of knee high grey suede boots form JCrew and you'll faint and be re-converted to consumerism."

Exploring meal times in Paraguay

The digression of a healthy meal:

"Can I make lunch today?"
-Yes, what are you going to make?
"Pasta and vegetable sauce."
-Hmmm, and tortillas (a fried food)?
"Umm... sure."
-Tortillas and sauce?
"And pasta?"
-Hmm, just tortillas and sopa (fried food).
"Bueno."

A debate with a child over vegetables


"Are you going to eat the vegetables, too?"
-I don't want the vegetables.
"Eat the vegetables. They're healthy."
-I don't want this food.
"What do you want?"
-I just want a battery for my little car.

The discussion of my birthday meal


"What do you want to eat for your birthday party?"
-Pizza and salad!
"Hmmmm. Salad."
-Is that okay? Is it normal to eat salad at night?
"She wants to know if it's normal to eat salad at night. Yes, yes it's normal. It's all good."
-Okay, so salad and pizza.
"And empanadas. And sopa (a fried food)."
-Okay, so salad, pizza, empanadas and sopa.
"Yes, empanadas and sopa, then."